Monday, March 14, 2011

Arsehole week continues!

Arsehole (and I use the British version 'cause it seems less rude) week continues and it isn’t showing any signs of running out of steam.

I’m trying to keep a low profile so I’m less of a target but it’s almost impossible to hide. It appears that not only do they hunt in packs, they’re also organized (which I suppose is an advantage if you're a pack) and they have a sense of smell so keen it’s impossible to hide for any length of time. So far the score is definitely in their favor.

I’ve told you how I moved back in August (except I deleted all older posts at the beginning of the year and now I’m referring to an actual event that happened before that and now I want them back….).

The house O, Bee and I moved into have become known as the "House of Props". What was an absolute beauty on the surface has proved to be a bit of a lemon. One day O was talking to me while I was having a bath. In mid conversation he suddenly found himself holding a towel rack in his hand and it was completely independent of the wall it had been attached to! Without skipping so much as a beat he showed it back onto the wall. It’s pretty much how the whole house is constructed.

Some time ago I noticed a couple of small holes developing in the backyard. We notified the real estate agent and they notified the owner and he notified his chosen handyman. Rey the handyman just put a concrete block over it to cover it. I think we were meant to forget about the whole thing which we tried.

We lifted that block a few weeks ago and it turned out the two small holes were now one giant hole and other little holes had developed near it away from the concrete block. Rey, who knows how to fix anything (although not necessarily well) turned up with four metal poles and some tape. We now have what looks like a crime scene in our backyard and I’m willing to bet money the neighbors are talking!

Rey on the other hand was rather pleased with the solution. Now no one will fall into the hole accidently he told me. I don’t know about that. The first thing the cats did was to take one look at the setup then jump straight into the cordoned off area as if had been created for their amusement. The tape was there to jump over and the poles were there to run around. They looked like little happy billy goats.

I wrote a stern letter to the real estate agent and tried not to cry. I used to have nightmares about my ex-husband hiding bodies in the backyard. It’s just a little too close to home you know.

I was going to add a chalk outline to make it more realistic but there's such a thing as being too obvious.


1 comment:

  1. i'm sorry about the crazy weird mystery gravelike hole in your back yard, but i LOVE your typface!

    ReplyDelete

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